Saturday, December 17, 2011

off the grid






starting tomorrow around noon...rhett and I will be off the grid for like 60 hours. finally. and awesome. it will be nice to have a real vacation. alex is house and critter sitting for us again...so thank you to awesome alex.

in other news....how did christmas sneak up so fast? feels like it was just summer. or maybe that's just because it is still so warm here. I looked down at my advent calendar and had 8 days of pretty yuck chocolate looking up at me. 8 days behind? thank you job.

my late nights have, however, created lots of fun tired-brained conversations with rhett. I recall telling him that chapstick is a conspiracy and our firstborn should be a giraffe. he told me he likes taco leftover nights because after I serve myself, he gets all the extra lettuce and can make "mount lettuce." awesome.

we did get to finally see all the seaworld christmas shows. which were awesome. it was like a minivacation...and we ran from show to show to be able to see them all. good day.

almost all of the rest of the news is just work quotes and such. there haven't been any new recent developments in the last week. just generally playing tag team between our busy work schedules. glad that's over soon.

-I am officially VIP tour trained! hopefully soon, I will get to spend days in the park taking families around to all the major attractions.
-I got to see a 4 day old rockhopper penguin chick. best day of my life.
-sleeping sea lions are funny. nightttime shift at the sealions is miserable because nobody wants to watch them sleep. but when they wipe their noses on each other, I can't help think how much they are like me and rhett.
-you look like a fool when:
1)your tag hangs out of your swim suit directly beneath your bosom.
2) you are on a family vacation and ignore your children for your cellphone.
3)you argue relentlessly with your 5 yr. old child about animal facts...when your kid is right. admit your kid is smarter than you.
4) you take a picture in front of frisky dolphins.
5) you ask me to take your picture in front of frisky dolphins. am I really doing you a favor? please don't put this on your christmas card.
6) you say "they're so cute" when they're being frisky. do you see what's really happening here?
7) you change your way-too-old child's clothing in the middle of a busy pathway. there is an age when naked kids are no longer appropriate in public.
8) you walk at what we like to call "tourist speed." I know I don't walk that slow ever.
9) you can't steer a stroller. unless of course you are aiming for my ankles. in which case you are very good. hopefully the stroller theiving squirrels come for you and eat your teddy grahams.
10) you approach an animal pool/exhibit, watch the animal walk around a corner, gripe, walk away 30 seconds later, and the animal comes back. you complain when they sleep, too, so decide what you want!
11) you try to get the attention of a sleeping animal. as if you didn't already look silly clapping at a sea lion, you now want to wake it up too. I will come to your house and clap at you when you are asleep too.
12) you forget roaches fly and freak out when one does. oh wait, that was me.
13) you ask if you can marry a beluga whale.
-me: "what is your favorite animal you saw all day?"
girl: "a rainbow dolphin."
-girl: "how do stingrays eat?"
me: "well they vacuum up their food"
girl: "and then they break it down with acid?"
me: "yup once it gets to their stomach they do."
girl: "first it goes through their throat."
me: "that's right...but their's isn't as long as ours. their stomach is pretty close to their mouth."
girl: "oh. and then it goes to their butt."
me: "uh...yup."
-girl: "come on mommy it's potty dance time!"
mom: "ok then let's find a bathroom."
girl: "no you have to potty dance...it goes like this!"
I'm with ya girl. time always goes slower when you need to go to the bathroom.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

since when?






since when is a small fry so small? I ordered a small fry at wendy's the other day...and it was tiny. which turned out to be a good thing anyway...because after putting a single fry into my stomach I immediately threw it back up. it couldn't have even been scripted that perfectly.

in pet news:
*so we're still not in the clear with the cat. that's not to say it's not an allergy, but that's not to say that it is. she got worse again and then better again. hopefully that's how allergies work.
*either way, it is nice that she has a personality again. she grooms the dog, and pounces on his tail (see facebook video. hilarious). she also chases the carpet fuzz...and everything is a toy. she also responds to any can opening (which made it difficult to make chicken and dumplings as I opened several cans of chicken soup.) she follows you around at your feet and cries until you feed her. I swear we are accidentally starving her. but she already eats more than her weight class should. she also finally sleeps. almost as if she needs to catch up for all the times when she couldn't sleep from itching.
*we also had a particularly scary/funny moment with roscoe. we saw crusty sticky brown stuff on his belly (similar to the consistency of cat face scabs) and freaked out. only to realize that it was peanut butter from the kong I left in his kennel that day. he also got a negative heartworm test! at least we are in the clear with one critter! I also have enjoyed getting to go to the dog park with aaryn and carol and niko and scobee. hopefully that tradition continues.

in home news:
*our christmas cards arrived! as most of you already figured out, it has the picture from my facebook. I couldn't resist the temptation. but the cards are cute too! I got them with a groupon discount $25 for $75 of credit on mixbook.com. I got our christmas cards and our wedding album!
*I also got a promotion! I am now an Educator II! as of now, the only change will be that I give VIP tours with exclusive groups through the park. it will be fun to really get to know the families!
*we are also dealing with the IRS....so pray for us there. we filed a (correct) return in february....they adjusted the "errors" on the return....then billed us and told us to amend the "errors" which they created. so I have to refile...to change it back to the original way it was...and pay them. ugh.
*also my parents got us furniture!! hooray! so we have a rug and two chairs and a sidetable in the living room..like real adults! it also doesn't sound so loud when rhett yells at football anymore. I also have a mosquito stalker. it is worse than a human stalker I promise.
*we also have punk neighbor kids...they broke some of our outside decorations! we found them broken in the street.
*our dollar store advent chocolate calendars are only soso this year.
*my latest craft projects include: beluga whale handwarmers, hemming a pair of pants without an iron or sewing machine, santa locker decorations and clothesline christmas decorations. will post pictures later.
*rhett's store buyback is going REALLY WELL. which is awesome. and kevin is here visting!
*we also officially booked our anniversary trip to tampa. 2 nights and 3 days of vacation fun. yesss. busch gardens, tampa zoo, clearwater aquarium, and probably a nice dinner thrown in there.

and work news...everyone's favorite.
*good parenting skills: 1) baby with "my mom is hot" written on shirt. 2)teaching the kids how to tap on the glass until the fish/animal comes over. 3)saying the f-word around baby. 4) taking baby's blanket to warm yourself up. because you know if you are cold, surely baby isn't.
*cute quotes: 1) kid: "how old is your oldest dolphin?" me: "33." kid "when I was 5 I was 33." 2)kid: "you know what I call it when a baby looks like its mom?" me: "what?" kid: "a midget clone."3) referring to sea lions: "look it's just like if we cut off chaos's legs!" 4) singing old mcdonald: "old mcdonald had a pig, eieio"...pause...... me: "ok what's a pig say?" ...."with a pig, pig here and a pig, pig there."
*other observations: 1) some of the sound effects that play at the slides at aquatica sound like babies crying. that's a way to get a kid on a ride. 2) I watched a baby lizard catch a cricket bigger than it was. awesome. 3)I saw what I thought might be a segway tour puttering across an overpass (maybe from universal studios?) but after doing some research, I was unable to find such a thing. segway posse?

merry christmas!!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

turducken no more.

it's about time right? I know. life is busy! I actually write down things when they happen so that I can remember them (to share with you), and it has been long enough that I can't remember some of the things on my list. hopefully my memory jogs as I start blogging.

so, in honor of the title, let's start with the critters. though I have only had turducken once in my life (and I was less than impressed), the title seemed to fit our current lifestyle. we have (FINALLY AFTER MONTHS OF INVESTIGATION) figured out that our cat has a poultry allergy. POULTRY. so when we put her on an allergy diet of DUCK and potato... yeah that didn't help at all. though we are not in the clear yet (aka the cat still wears the cone because she still itches), she actually looks like a cat. and plays. and can do something other than scratch herself. EXCITEMENT. so we are being very careful to keep her out of the dog food, and wash our hands a lot (afterall we had turkey every day this week). also, eating doesn't pain her anymore...so let me tell you, this cat can put away some food. it's like "show me how the piggies eat?" today, rhett called her a black hole. she has eaten 12 oz. of food today (and would eat more if I put it in front of her). too bad her food is like $2-3 per day. yipes. I will be looking into preparing my own cat food. she also likes to sit on my shoulders. weirdo. and play with my bangs. roscoe has a new game too! we chase him, and then hide. then he comes to find us. he loves it. hide and seek, and you never have to be IT. also, all 3 critters participated fairly well in the christmas card picture taking (thank you daddy photographer). roscoe might have eaten moose, which made aggie mad. but all in all, we have a picture with all faces smiling at the camera.

in other news...mommy and daddy came to visit! so fun. we went to seaworld, universal, ucf, downtown disney, and had thanksgiving and christmas. I am so glad we got to see them and celebrate. mom also got me this. can't wait to have an occasion to use it. we did a jigsaw puzzle, shopped, watched movies, and played rhett's new board game. what a good vacation! can't wait to see them again soon. we also had a pretty good seaworld trip. every show had a...ahem...change (mistake). so cool. hadn't seem some of those before. it was also funny to be asked in to work while they were here, to which I responded "if you let me do a tour shift and let my parents on all my tours." they actually considered it for about 90 seconds.

we also received our wedding photos (yippee!!). can't wait to get some prints made and frame it up in here.

I would also like to personally thank emily martin for showing me to pinterest and how to mix ketchup and ranch. omg.

other general grievances...my fantasy football bench this week is going to beat my starting lineup. don'tcha hate that? the good news is, I probably still wouldn't have won the game. also, I paid $6 extra for a gift to arrive on time, and it arrived early. glad, but I wouldn't have paid the extra if I had known.

and more reasons why I am thankful for my rhett. 1) playing basketball in the kitchen with trash while cleaning up. even chores are fun with you. 2) watching you dance to michael buble christmas. classic and epic. 3) when you make yourself some cinnamon toast, eat half of it, then mention it is bland. I take a bite, and say "well you didn't put any sugar on it." ...."oh, you put sugar on cinnamon toast?" 4) making a christmas playlist for our ipod in the middle of november. 5) tired rhett telling me "you better not or I will tie butter to your feet and slide you across the tile floor! 6)moving the mattress into the living room so that we can sleep next to the christmas tree lights. 7) planning an anniversary trip to celebrate ourselves. 8) cleaning up mounds of melted chocolate in the kitchen after I break a big bowl full.

and of course, everyone's favorites. last but not least, work news and quotes.
-SW started christmas music last weekend. AWESOME.
-I saw a family of rattails...including one girl with double rattails. it reminded me of when mom suggested I get a bob. looks like the girl got away with cutting all of her hair except two little braids in the back. it was accentuatingly funny that I saw a penguin with a rattail the same day. the chicks are fledging (molting) and it is difficult for them to reach the back of their neck. HILarious. also: I realized I look like a fool when I imitate sleeping penguins on their heels. you may ask for an impression at a later time.
-DOLPHINS: 1)I have heard many a "how do you call the dolphins over?" with subsequent whistling, clapping, splashing, and generally things that send dolphins the other way. but pulling out an iphone which makes dolphin noises....good effort sir. 2) there was a little girl who loved dolphins so much that she took 2 back-to-back dolphin tours in the same day. classic. 3) if you are going to the dolphin pool where you will be LEANING OVER, please have sufficient coverage of your chestal area (for those who have to stand above you and look down at you) and sufficient hiney coverage (for those who must stand behind you). 4) when kids come up and ask "can we feed the dolphins today?" with mom standing behind the child giving you evil eyes and shaking their head NO with a death sentence. "sorry buddy, the dolphins already had breakfast, lunch and dinner today and they're all full." yikes! 5) very sweet british boy with mental disability "what do the dolphins eat?" me: "lots of fish!" boy: "fish and chips?" 6) when a squirrel falls into the dolphin pool
-something I like to call the "no english smile." we get lots of people from all around the world (which is great) but it's funny to say "do you have any questions" and just get a smile and nod back. or "okay." or to give an entire tour to someone who spoke no english except "touch a penguin?". it's even better when they say "no english" and then go read a sign. yeah.
-seeing santa come to wardrobe from the north pole, hand his jacket to backup santa, and say "you saw nothing."
-"is there glass there?" no. the barracudas are suspended in midair. or are you underwater?
-and of course the classic jokes about how animals taste...which are sometimes more real than jokes. "I ate seaturtle for 9 days straight in the galapagos in the 60's." yikes. please don't tell me when you catch/feed/play with/taste animals. it is the most awkward situation.
-girl: "I have 3 pets at home."
me: "oh yeah? what are their names?"
girl: "burt, rosalina and spikealina. I liked -lina so I added it to spike."
me: hysterically laughing
-5 year old boy, mid stingray conversation. "you know what my favorite movie is?"
me: "what?"
boy: "titanic. you know, when the boat goes down?"
-me: "would you like to see the octopus?"
little girl: "apple juice?"
-in passerby conversation, hearing a dad say "well why don't we just get a real orca?"
-and the grand finale: walking out of the park today to go home, I looked up into the sky to see "PRAISE JESUS" scripted in the sky in a plane's smoke trail.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Happy ThanksChristmas!

well, our adventure is over. for now, at least. we have returned home after a great 'vacation', and settled back into the homelife. so, journey along with us!

last time I wrote, it was the tuesday before we left. Welllll, tuesday night, guess who started feeling crummy? me. I went to work on wednesday, where I took (and passed) my test, and also got evalled on my first penguin tour (convenient, right?). all in all, I made it through the day. but MAN did I want to go home. anyway, we taught Alex and Will how to bathe the cat, and got everything ready to leave. then Willie took us to the airport on thursday and off we went!

First stop: Houston. We went out to eat with Angie and James, got to visit both stores in Houston, and played a game and went to sleep. We love the Schumachers and miss them mucho.

Second stop: College Station. Early friday morning we headed up and left so the boys could get to their meetings (the whole reason we made it to Texas right?). And they dropped me off with bestie Emily! she taught me how to drive a standard, so I could borrow her car all day (love you awesome!) and I proceeded to visit with some UPaint it girls, and have lunch with Casey and chat with Jayne and rest up. Then my parents arrived, and we all went out to eat at Fuddruckers. Em and I went to midnight yell, and then early in the morning Angie, Em and I went to the Aggie game and step off and all the good jazz that comes with being an Aggie (thanks for taking us ang!). oh man it was so good to be home. then I went with the family shopping and to eat...thank you parents for the wardrobe additions and the marvelous pumpkin bread from blue baker. omg I have a newfound love. then I spent one more slumber party night with the girls, we watched maid in manhattan, and then got up to eat fuego for breakfast and go shopping at target. yes. and then, all too quickly it was time for stop #3.

stop 3: mamma's. so then matt drove us to new braunfels...where we met up with rhett's grandparents and his parents and spent the night there. then bright and early we left for stop #4

stop 4: dalhart. we arrived in dalhart, where we had many adventures. we went to the corn maze, played outside, visited the house the cearleys may soon have, made wassail, celebrated thanksgiving, did crafts, went to the library, went shopping, saw snow!, went to the canyon, celebrated christmas, and generally just enjoyed family. nikki was such a good hostess, and we always love when we get to visit them. the boys are getting so big, and are very much brothers already. I saw Lane wipe his snot on colt's arm once. and once again, leaving for the next stop snuck up on us.

stop 5: houston. friday we arrived at brandon and jessica's, where we got to celebrate the twins being 1 year old! their real birthday is today...but we celebrated with their small group and with family. we are so glad we got to see even more family! we saw the griers and aunt cheryl and uncle brad and JB and had such a good time. we ate cake, did crafts, talked, and just enjoyed each other. I miss living across the street from them!

all in all it was a great vacation. I was never homesick until we made this trip...but we are so glad we got to come. in 9 nights, we stayed in 6 different places, rode in 5 cars and who knows how many other blessings we got. alex did a great job with the house...again we appreciate him so much. it is such a blessing to have people who love us enough to make such a big commitment for us after just a few months. thanks to everyone who made it a great vacation.

and since we've been back..we have already had quite a busy few days! SW started decorating for christmas before we even left...so when we got back we knew it was acceptable to follow suit. plus, it's less than 2 weeks before mom and dad get here to celebrate thanksgiving and christmas! that snuck up on me...I still have more shopping to do! we drank hot cocoa and watched the santa clause and elf, and just loved the season. I love my husband. sometimes he gives me this look like 'I can't believe you're my wife.' melt my heart. also, he lets me get on the roof of the house. and finally, you know you have a winner when he headbutts the roof clips for the xmas lights to get them to fit snug.

last but not least: work quotes and stories. first day back, and I have list to end all lists. thank you offseason aquatica.
-I am privileged to announce I saw a commerson's dolphin fart. check. how many animals is that now?
-you know somebody has good parenting skills when a 11-13 year old girl walks up wearing shorts that say "I'm in Miami B****" on the butt.
-you really think you're smooth and sneaky when you go to a corner to pick a wedgie and or change clothes. but you're not. and you make people uncomfortable.
-I love how a tiny commerson's dolphin (5 ft.) is still so huge to a 2 year old.
-I know that swimsuits can be uncomfortable, but please refrain from talking to me with your hands down your trunks.
-when you eat all of the chocolate shell off your icecream popsicle, it will inevitably all come falling off the stick sooner or later.
-armpits are gross. armpit tattoos are grosser. also, what is a gorilla biscuit and why would you tattoo it on you?

-boy: "are they not plastic?"
me: "no they're not plastic."
boy: "are they alive?"
me: "yes they're alive."
-man: "do we get wet on this ride?"
me (thinking): 'well it is a water park.' "yes."
-me (as woman walks the wrong direction towards water slide) "ma'am are you looking for dolphin plunge?"
woman: "yes we are."
me (pointing): "ok it is right over here and to the right."
woman: "no we want to go on the dolphin ride."
me: "yes ma'am it's right this way."
woman: "ok thanks anyway" walks the other way...only to come back and get in line 30 seconds later. duh.
-mom: "how many dolphins are there?"
little girl: "8,9,10!"

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

T-minus 48 hours

Today marks 2 days until we arrive in Texas. after months of planning and plan changing, we will finally arrive and get to enjoy the fruits of our labor. we get to see our BFFs, play in college station, see my mommy!!!!! eat delicious Texas foods that we have missed out on for 7-9 months (aka Chicken express...florida how do you live without it?), meet our nephew, and celebrate thanksgiving and christmas with the grimes side of the family.

That means that today (aka my day off) is filled with vacation preparation. conjunction junction. and to make my life even more easy, I signed up to take a test to progress at work tomorrow (so I have to study for that as well). But I have found ways to break up the day (thank you new episodes of toddlers and tiaras on netflix). I will defeat you suitcases and cleaning. I also already foresee myself missing Roscoe while we are gone.

last but not least, thank you to Alex Thomas who is the new best person I know. He agreed, without hesitation, to housesit for us....cat medication/baths and all. Alex Thomas: I appreciate you more than I could ever express to you in words. You are a really great young man, and we have loved getting to be a part of your family. Thank you for showing us love!

other news in the grimes household:
-we lowered our energy bill by 50%! how awesome is that! best month ever.
-once upon a time the catroom (guest bathroom) stunk bad. of course, there is a litterbox in a tight space, but it was an unbearable stench. after scrubbing and replacing all the litter, I discovered that the box could not be the source of the stench. low and behold, the toilet of stagnant water was moldy and disgusting and had gone untouched for over a month until it became disgusting. glad I discovered it finally. now it just smells like cat in there. bearable.
-I beat rhett in fantasy football last week.
-I made a strawberry cake on sunday night...and rhett's compliment for how it smelled/looked was "oh man I am going to do nasty things to that cake." A similar comment about my taco dinner last week was "oh man Roscoe I bet you wish you were a human right now so you could eat these tacos." his compliments make me giggle.
-I love it when I catch Rhett rewatching football games online that LITERALLY just ended on real TV.
-There was a particularly gross moment where the dog yawned, then I yawned, and he licked inside my mouth (gross enough, right?). well then Rhett felt compelled to say to me: "oh that's so gross, he was licking the bottom of my feet last night!". gag me.
-We have been taking morning walks together before work. It is easily the best part of my day.
-our friends the Somers finally brought home their 2 boys from ethiopia! What a glorious and celebratory week for them! We can't wait to take them to Aquatica for their first ever waterslides when we get back from Texas!
-a normal discussion in the grimes household: how much would someone have to pay you to lick your own armpit? can you even reach your own armpit?


other news on the pet front:can you spot her?
-we went to the dermatologist. the bill was depressing and the news was less than shocking. we are continuing treating for the things we already treated for. this better work dadgommit. I am so done with treating the same things with no results. fix my dang cat already!
-Roscoe has started quickly emptying and bringing over every toy in his toy bin any time he wants any attention at all. it makes for a very uncomfortable couch.

also in the news:
-what the what? did anybody see the man in Ohio who let 56 exotic animals (grizzlies, lions, cheetahs, bengal tigers, camels) free and then killed himself? good job guy, it's all your fault that 18 out of the 2500 remaining tigers of the world are now dead.
-matt wertz and michael buble both released christmas cd's this week. what to do?

and last but not least, everyone's (I'm sure) favorite: work stories and guest quotes:
NEWS:
-I had the privilege of staffing the sea lion area minutes after a sea lion pup was born. (then of course closing the area for a quick check up.) but still, awesome. seeing a 10 minute old sea lion= check.
-the word "penguin" is not in my phone. how can you be a zoologist's phone and not know the word penguin?
-I officially gave my first dolphin tour, first penguin talk, and second penguin talk all in the same week. a week of firsts, and a week of fun! so exciting!

these are a few of my FAVORITE THINGS:
-spray sunscreen: as much as I love your convenience, I would equally love a disclaimer on your bottle stating "lack of regard for other persons downwind or within a confined space may result in injury" thereby making it acceptable for me to throw punches.
-seeing a grown woman reach her foot over a 4' wall into a dolphin pool. classic.
-when a daddy says "look at all the mantas" to a child. we have not a single manta in SW.
-clearly, squirrels are the most awesome animals on the planet. because guests will turn their back on a manatee feeding to get one step closer to a squirrel.
-earlier in the week I opened up a drawer in our riddle box to discover....a roach. which then proceeded to scamper away. SICK. hopefully the nearest child wasn't traumatized.
-trick or treating at halloween spooktacular. bookoos of free candy.
-settling bets and dividing families: "is it a dolphin or a whale?"
-talking to little kids as they lather themselves in sunscreen, with no social regard for how silly they look lotioning themselves.

QUOTES:
after seeing a woman duck under a rope barrier at an overlook across the sea lion pool, I made my up to the overlook to tell her: "ma'am, I'm really sorry this area is closed off right now." woman says: "oops." like she stumbled across a closed area. it's not like you made a concerted effort to dodge the rules.

woman: "what will I see at dolphin cove?"
me thinking: 'dolphins.'

me holding a polar bear pawprint: "can you guess what animal this is from?
little girl: "a monster."

boy: "how do dolphins sleep?"
me: "they sleep half of their brains at a time, so they are always halfway awake. can you think why that might be important?"
boy: "so they can check for monsters under their bed?"

me: "do you know what polar bears eat?"
boy: "root beer?"

and I overheard this last one from a lifeguard. it's nice to know we are not the only ones who deal with silly questions.
man asked: "why did you breed dolphins and penguins?"

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Zombie Cat





like our halloween decorations? we do too. we also made our mr. and mrs. potato head costumes. psyched to trick or treat with our nephews!! also, speaking of halloween, Rhett calls Aggie zombie cat. because she looks like a zombie, obviously. we officially go see the dermatologist on Monday. hopefully they tell us it was mange afterall...because she seemed to get better after last week (when she completely destroyed her face. our closet looked like a murder scene).

more about the pets:
-we bought their christmas gifts. can't wait 2 more months!!
-Rhett says the SPCA must have shown Roscoe videos on how to be an awesome dog. because he is.
-aggie's new allergen-free food makes her dooky smell NASTY. G-ross.


more things I like about Rhett:
-sleeping in until 10am last weekend when it rained ALL DAY. literally 3am until 10:30pm.
-waking up at 5am when the smoke detector decides to get a low battery. on an 11ft ceiling. boo.
-changing our oil and washing our cars together
-when he speaks my toothbrush language
-when he lays out my clothes for me in the morning when I don't want to get up and go to work

more things about work:
-it is officially desturbing to hear the key west music on the radio (music that plays on loop in dolphin cove all day long)
-I almost punched a young man in the face after watching him feed his cell phone to a pelican. do you have a brain sir?
-when you drive to work with no AC on, your "fuel range" actually increases. coolest feeling ever.
- I am officially tour trained!!! which made for the coolest week ever. touched a shark, touched a penguin, met a puffin, walked inside penguin encounter, saw a manatee xray, saw the top of shark encounter, went inside the infamous fish house, saw the surgical suite where frogs and manatees alike are treated, saw one day's worth of fish at SW (5,000 lb.) in the freezer, saw the rescued pilot whale...and generally enjoyed myself. can't wait to give tours so the guests can have such an awesome time as well.
-I also applied to cross-train as a reservationist. hopefully I have enough confrontational ability to deal with trouble guests.
-joking with coworkers about LRS-ing trouble guests. an LRS is what we do with our dolphins when they don't listen...ignore them for 3 seconds. I hate when complainy people get exactly what they want. so can't we just ignore them for 3 seconds too?
-our tour bus drivers are bob and larry....just like veggie tales!

and last, but certainly everyone's favorite: guest quotes.
-man approaching a trick-or-treat booth during our halloween spooktacular: "trick or treat I heard you have tootsie rolls."
-woman in all seriousness (because she is a SW employee's wife) in penguin encounter: "when the penguins get older and sick, do you ever give them to shamu?"
-mother to daughter: "look honey, it's a shark stingray thingy." real informative mom. good thing I was standing there.

Friday, October 7, 2011

Thank Shamu It's Friday

and what a nice weekend it has the potential to be!

all updates, big and small:

there was a mosquito inside our house that was literally the biggest mosquito I have seen in my life. like Godzilla mosquito. it was at least 1 cm long.

I hit a bucket in the road on my way to work one day. ugh.

we finally went swing dancing here in town! Our friends eric and shaina went with us...and man did I miss dancing! I had so much fun! I can't wait to go back again sometime.

I met a really nice couple at SW who I might have a future babysitting relationship with. crazy? maybe. but they were so cute!

I have applied to be a full time educator....and on another note, I begin tour training next week!! pictures to come! also, it is slightly disillusioning to see pictures of trainers partying. role models. disappointment.

orlando made it on the top 20 list of "sleepless US cities". I believe it. 3 out of the last 4 weeks I had a lot of trouble sleeping. I am finally just this week making up for all that lost sleep, and sleeping through the night. oh, and, not a single TX city made the list.

our laptop crashed, and our awesome computer friends in our small group fixed it. they are so awesomer than best buy.

Daddy came to visit!!! we went to downtown disney, and he came to have dinner at our house, and we went to seaworld. and we did everything in 5 hours. who knew that was even possible.

tired rhett strikes again...we got on the topic of ordering our food "a la carte" while we were at seaworld...and he said "I don't want it over ice cream." oh honey. that's a la mode.

so I'm not super great at fantasy football. but I'm learning, and trying. I finally won my first game this week!

and of course, the cat. it is very difficult and embarrassing to look at her, and see that she is worse. she looks horrible. and we still don't have a diagnosis. we are 2 weeks away from visiting the dermatologist 45 minutes and $400 away. the poor thing. she likes to sleep in roscoe's kennel, and he gets confused. especially when I ask him to go in there. he kind of lays down on top of her. we tried to treat her for food allergies, so far with no success. we are currently treating for scabies. next treatment is for pemphigus, which is autoimmune and basically her own body is telling her skin not to hold on to itself. bless her heart.

and on a lighter note...some guest quotes.

belugas: *vocalizing*
guest near walruses: "is that a child? that must be one sick child."

guest: "isn't the polar bear lonely?"
me: "actually polar bears are solitary animals."
guest: "you couldn't even give it a penguin buddy?"

guest: "who's skull is this?"
me: "well why don't you try and tell me what it looks like?"
guest: "i don't know:
me: "it's a bottlenose dolphin."
guest: "ohhh I was thinking tarantula."
what??

also, I saw a barracuda fart. awesome.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

a big sigh of....


touching a penguin. no big deal.
the parents came to visit! daddy comes on sunday!!!!
my home away from home.
brittany + great white shark
aww tilly! what a big boy!

a sigh of relief? contentment? exhaustion? all of the above. life has certainly kept us busy over the last 10 days.

firstly, because it is most recently, we returned to the vet. I decided last night that the cat was not, in fact, getting better. so the vet trip was inevitable. and today I had a day off. so bright and early we arrived to the loving staff who agreed, she is not better. they re-tested for mange (because I was so CERTAIN that's what it was. thank you cat webmd). negative. the new diagnosis: autoimmune. drop everything. what? skin cancer? hyper-allergies? hyper-sensitivity? all of these things sound like things a cat shouldn't get. I was JUST reading about how cats are still not very domesticated. still WILD. how can they get such a complicated and domestic sickness? and what kind of CAT needs a DERMATOLOGIST? I, as a human, have never visited a dermatologist. so that's where we are. our cat is on Roids, and hopefully we can juice up her immune system so she quits destroying her own body. her poor bloody face just makes me so sad. especially because she so desperately wants love, and I am so willing to just let her wipe her mangled disgusting face all over me. in brighter news...the cat loves to play with the dog's tail. which is hilarious. she also gives him the "you're nuts" look when he chases his ball around. like, "how could that be entertaining you. simple pleasures for simple minds." anyone out there who likes animals...read "animals make us human." (thank you mom). GREAT book. it is also funny to watch the cat realize she has to go to the bathroom and dash off to the litter box mid-stride. and when she falls off of things because she stretches too far. we also have video of her attacking a string cheese wrapper. good thing we bought her toys. I also had a pet dream....about a dog eating a fruit by the foot and then pooping out poop on the 3' fruit by the foot paper.

oh suburban life. we just got a new sign in our subdivision...so we no longer live in "COLON WODS" we now live in "COLONIAL WOODS". awesome. also, you know you have a long commute when you have to switch radio stations halfway to work because it goes out. also, I have put in an application for an animal care job with the education department at a local zoo. it would be 2-3 days a week so I could balance SW at the same time! hopefully I hear from them soon. also, rhett and I celebrated our 4 year dating anniversary. which also means we are 100 days away from our wedding anniversary. it's cool how that worked out. they will always be 100 days apart! we will have to do some creative counting down. last year we did pennies. speaking of countdowns...who's excited about chocolate advent calendars? I AM!

daytime television. watching jeopardy with humans versus a computer. how does that work? watson mysteries. also: an episode of cheaters in which the wife's nurse fell in love with the husband. she quotes "we thought you were going to die." well you were here nurse, moron. lose-lose situation. on a higher note, nighttime television has returned! parenthood and how I met your mother down; big bang theory, the office, parks and rec and House to go! it will be a busy fall.

be sure and visit facebook for a new photo album of delightful goodness!


last but not least: guest quotes.

"what kind of skull is that?"
me: "it's a bottlenose dolphin."
"oh I thought it was a bird."
"a bird?"
"you know, like kevin from Up!"

son: "how do they sleep?"
me: "well dolphins actually sleep one half of their brain at a time, so they can always be a little bit awake."
dad: "like you (son) in school."
son: "no I don't use any of my brain in school. except on spelling tests."

mother: "we did a school project on sea turtles. and I know it was good because I did it. I should save it so my younger son can use it next year. there are just too many projects, they can't expect us to get them all done."
me (thinking): way to go mom. so your children don't do any of their own school work?

also I might have had a minor panic attack when I saw creepy fingers clinging to a little girl, only to realize she had an ET doll holding on around her neck. you know she didn't get that at seaworld either.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

ketchup.

or catch up. whichever you prefer. if you prefer ketchup, try your fridge. if you prefer catching up, stay right here.

a lot of these will be pet things. let's start with that...because now we are basically a zoo. more animals live in our house than humans. so the cat uses my hand to groom itself. because she is coned and can't use her own paws. so she licks my hand and then wipes her face on it. sick. but cute. it is also funny to watch her because she can only reach the tips of her toes and the tip of her tail to groom herself. those parts of her body are clean. the cat sleeps on the dog bed and the dog likes the cat bed...and they get along great. they also play together. she swats at his tail and he gives me the 'mom aren't you going to stop her' look. and she has found a place where she can wait and pounce on him when he tears down the hallway. too funny. and a funny rhett quote: "CAT! rule one of begging! don't claw the person that you want something from!" also...I took the dog out last night, and he started to pee, then saw a lizard that he wanted to chase. he continued peeing while chasing the lizard, so proceeding to continue to pee all over himself. moron.

and what have we been up to lately?

well the grimes came to visit! so a lot, actually! we went to seaworld on saturday, and did EVERYTHING. ladies and gentlemen, it is physically possible to see everything at seaworld in one day. (not suggested without a tour guide, of course :) ) then sunday we went to play washers at the doggy park and went to watch the A&M/SMU game with the local A&M club and met some local aggies! btho. then monday we went to downtown disney. and let me tell you, I love downtown disney. it is such a fun date! we visited all the shops, and ate at rainforest cafe, had ghiradelli (MOM YOU HAVE TO TRY THEIR PUMPKIN SPICE CARAMEL FILLED SQUARES OH MY GOSH I HAD 3). we rode the boats to the resort that we stayed on our honeymoon. and then...there was a "dance party" going on. I made rhett promise to dance with me. I had him convinced. LITERALLY, right as we approached the dance party (we said, let's see how good the next song is) the dj came over the mic and said "and now we are going to do some swing dancing!" is that fate or what? so we went down and lindied. lindyed? lindy-ed? lindy hopped. awesome. and tuesday was discovery cove day. we snorkeled with the reef fishes and the southern, spotted eagle and cownose rays (HUGE) and *hopefully* got some good pictures (soon to come). what a great week.

hours are starting to pick back up again (already) with work. which is nice. and it was nice to have a little break after 40 hr. wks most of the summer. hopefully I can start volunteering soon. be praying for possible career moves? my brain is all over the place.

also, kids jeopardy is awesome. because I actually know the answers.

guest quotes:
woman entering arctic: "man it got dark really quickly!"
me: "umm it's a fake sky. you're really inside."

little boy:"do you think I could beat a polar bear?"
me: "probably not, polar bears are twice as big as me, and weigh 5 times as much."
little boy: "what if I had a sword?"
me: "maybe if you had a sword."
boy's dad: "I love it when he talks about killing things to the conservation people."

joke. "what is a killer whale's favorite type of pudding?"
answer: "tapiORCA pudding!"

Monday, August 29, 2011

bleeding hearts. it's a long one!

our cat: as you most likely saw on facebook, rhett and I have taken in a very sick kitty. she followed us home from our dog walk, stayed on the porch all night long, and we declared her ours (and named her Aggie). we took her to the (Awesome) vet...who poured out their love and some free help on us. I will put up before and after pictures once she is all better. she is doing well, and roscoe seems to be acclimating (slowly) to her presence. he just wants to sniff her until his nose explodes. and she has a tolerance of about 45 seconds before she is tired of being sniffed. they will soon be cuddling! speaking of kitties...the cat aisle at petsmart is ridiculous. everything is pink, purple, matching decals, and believe it or not....multicolored cat nail covers (plastic nail polish). word.

central florida life: I fully appreciate when our neighbors do laundry. it makes the whole neighborhood smell delicious. and since I haven't been able to use scented laundry detergent since middle school...I just want to curl up in their garage and go to sleep. ahhh tide. you smell like heaven.

I saw someone rear end someone else on the way to small group. even though the offended had his windows down, and I was able to hear it going the other direction, he didn't seem to notice. lucky for the offender.

we met a black lab puppy named abby. she was pulling her owner along on a skateboard, and we met her at the corner. which was unlucky for said skateboarder, because she totally detoured towards us causing him to fly off the skateboard. epic.

our local walgreens had everything on my list buy one get one free. best day ever.

the orlando sentinel (local paper, pretty good) gave out free copies in our neighborhood! awesome! they are all in spanish.

apparently chili's is the new classy place to get trashed and talk about your abusive boyfriends and latest sexual encounters. oh central florida.

we saw a vulture scavenging in one of our neighbors trash cans. it was awesome. and huge. we also have a gorgeous hawk and a few curious turtles in the woods near the house. awesome to watch slash restrain roscoe from pouncing on.

the local news said: "Irene is ready to give the coast a whoopin'". best newscast ever.

alafaya discount tire=awesome. flat tire fixed, tires rotated for free in 30 minutes. you can't beat service like that. also while I sat there, I was able to read this slightly offensive article. enjoy. didn't realize florida hated texas so much.

husband things: tired rhett is my favorite rhett. except for roscoe-dog-voice rhett. tired rhett turns any wrinkle/skin fold on my knees/tummy/forehead into the harry potter sorting hat.

it is already christmastime in the grimes household. be jealous. christmas music has commenced.

a few days ago, I turned the water cold while rhett was in the shower. he didn't realize what I did. he thought the valve was loose. I did it 3 or 4 times. I tried again yesterday. he noticed. then poured our brita pitcher on me while I was in the shower.

work things:
there aren't very many this week. I didn't work much. I did discover that swiping into a certain building (where we put away our microphone) brings up our picture at the security gate. so if you walk straight to the gate, you see yourself on the guard's computer screen. weird.

"is the water sweet or salty?"

guest: "where do the animals sleep?"
me: "right here, this is their home all the time."
guest: "they don't go inside at night?"
my thoughts: 'there isn't an "inside" in the ocean is there?'
my words: "no ma'am."

Saturday, August 20, 2011

saturday morning

a day off? that actually happens? I can't remember my last official day of nothing-critical-to-do-today. it is wonderful. I watched the magic school bus. and might go use a coupon to get new white shoes (it was dubbed my present to myself for getting the part-time job).

so...updates. Rhett is at work today....it is officially the rush. keep your fingers crossed for a promising sell period!

the grimes come to visit in only 2 weeks! we can't wait! we got our tickets booked for discovery cove, and seaworld on saturday! and the last weekend of summer shows! whoop whoop! and watching the aggies BTHO SMU in the season opener with the central florida texas a&m club! we can't wait. and my daddy is coming to visit the last week of september for a work meeting! and then we go to texas at the end of october, and then my parents for thanksgiving, and then rhett's family for christmas! I can't believe that we are close enough to christmas and keeping busy enough that we will get to see someone every 3 weeks for the rest of the year! eeeek!!! how great did that work out?

last year, the wedding forced me to be productive. I brought up taking christmas card pictures soon, and rhett scoffed. then I mentioned by this time last year I had the cards finished and addressed, and all christmas presents purchased and wrapped. I've got to get a move on! speaking of wedding, our video came in the mail this week! we thought we would wait to watch it, but we gave in. pretty weird to watch ourselves. and funny to see everything we missed!

also, I am teaching myself sign language. as mentioned in a previous post, I think it is awesome. I started with a website that teaches you your first 100 words. who knows what I will do next? probably join the library and get a video.

also, I didn't get the animal care job. which is ok, I didn't expect it. I just loved the swim test! I also got a callback for an educator job at the museum, which didn't sound like something I would want to do, or something that I could do at the same time as SW. so I didn't get that one either.

last night rhett and I played mario, and our discussion to describe world 8 turned into something like this.
"oh my goodness just run as fast as you can!" "world 8 is like satan's butthole." "watch out for that hedgehog!" "that's not a hedgehog that's a football helmet with legs!" "no way it's a hedgehog, I wouldn't want a hedgehog in my butthole." "well would you want a football helmet with legs in your butthole?"
I love my husband.

doggy things: when he gets the hiccups, it's adorable. I hate the hiccups, so I feel sorry for him, but it is so cute. also on days like today, we have been playing agility in the living room. I set up an obstacle course- which he is pretty good at. he is so smart! then he goes and lays down to take a nap, and sticks his head under the couch. so when I look down at my feet I see the headless dog. too funny.

speaking of doggies, when we went to the Texas A&M vs. UCF soccer game (btho!) we met the soccer collies! coolest dogs ever. you can even see me in one of their pictures!

and of course, work things.

whoa! check out that pokey-ball!

julie scardina is my new career idol. sw/bg animal ambassador. I want to be her when I grow up. see her segments on the today show!

-dad talking to son: points to batswana on map "this is where your sister was named after. ranaka! and....." points to california "this is where you are named after! logan!"
-dad turns to me: "it's pretty sad when one of your children is named after a city in botswana, and the other is named after a character from gilmore girls."

brother and sister pair approach the chameleon enclosure. sister has seen chameleon earlier in the day and told her brother it was "this big" with fingers about 2 inches apart. brother approaches enclosure and nearly poops himself because chameleon is actually about 18" long.
"that chameleon is not 'this big'!" brother says. sister says: "yes he is!" (as she stands 2-3 feet away from enclosure and holds up her fingers to measure).

that awkward moment when you realize you have been telling guests it is a "swimming anenome" about 50% of the time and a "swimming anemone" about 50% of the time. how cliche.

that awkward moment when you are capable of listening and talking at the same time, and you hear a guest behind you say "just like me at home, talking to myself" as you narrate over the microphone.

that awkward moment when you want to kick a child after he kicks the chameleon enclosure. what the what?

that awkward moment when you want to kick another child who is spinning her krinkle straw so it whistles incessantly and you can't escape.

that awkward moment when a weird dude licks all his raspberry pastry off his plate and tells you not to order a mango cream drink from starbucks. then chugs it.

that awkward moment when you congratulate a little girl for getting all the answers right on a matching game, who then tells you she just looked at the tag.