off the grid

starting tomorrow around noon...rhett and I will be off the grid for like 60 hours. finally. and awesome. it will be nice to have a real vacation. alex is house and critter sitting for us again...so thank you to awesome alex.

in other news....how did christmas sneak up so fast? feels like it was just summer. or maybe that's just because it is still so warm here. I looked down at my advent calendar and had 8 days of pretty yuck chocolate looking up at me. 8 days behind? thank you job.

my late nights have, however, created lots of fun tired-brained conversations with rhett. I recall telling him that chapstick is a conspiracy and our firstborn should be a giraffe. he told me he likes taco leftover nights because after I serve myself, he gets all the extra lettuce and can make "mount lettuce." awesome.

we did get to finally see all the seaworld christmas shows. which were awesome. it was like a minivacation...and we ran from show to show to be able to see them all. good day.

almost all of the rest of the news is just work quotes and such. there haven't been any new recent developments in the last week. just generally playing tag team between our busy work schedules. glad that's over soon.

-I am officially VIP tour trained! hopefully soon, I will get to spend days in the park taking families around to all the major attractions.
-I got to see a 4 day old rockhopper penguin chick. best day of my life.
-sleeping sea lions are funny. nightttime shift at the sealions is miserable because nobody wants to watch them sleep. but when they wipe their noses on each other, I can't help think how much they are like me and rhett.
-you look like a fool when:
1)your tag hangs out of your swim suit directly beneath your bosom.
2) you are on a family vacation and ignore your children for your cellphone.
3)you argue relentlessly with your 5 yr. old child about animal facts...when your kid is right. admit your kid is smarter than you.
4) you take a picture in front of frisky dolphins.
5) you ask me to take your picture in front of frisky dolphins. am I really doing you a favor? please don't put this on your christmas card.
6) you say "they're so cute" when they're being frisky. do you see what's really happening here?
7) you change your way-too-old child's clothing in the middle of a busy pathway. there is an age when naked kids are no longer appropriate in public.
8) you walk at what we like to call "tourist speed." I know I don't walk that slow ever.
9) you can't steer a stroller. unless of course you are aiming for my ankles. in which case you are very good. hopefully the stroller theiving squirrels come for you and eat your teddy grahams.
10) you approach an animal pool/exhibit, watch the animal walk around a corner, gripe, walk away 30 seconds later, and the animal comes back. you complain when they sleep, too, so decide what you want!
11) you try to get the attention of a sleeping animal. as if you didn't already look silly clapping at a sea lion, you now want to wake it up too. I will come to your house and clap at you when you are asleep too.
12) you forget roaches fly and freak out when one does. oh wait, that was me.
13) you ask if you can marry a beluga whale.
-me: "what is your favorite animal you saw all day?"
girl: "a rainbow dolphin."
-girl: "how do stingrays eat?"
me: "well they vacuum up their food"
girl: "and then they break it down with acid?"
me: "yup once it gets to their stomach they do."
girl: "first it goes through their throat."
me: "that's right...but their's isn't as long as ours. their stomach is pretty close to their mouth."
girl: "oh. and then it goes to their butt."
me: "uh...yup."
-girl: "come on mommy it's potty dance time!"
mom: "ok then let's find a bathroom."
girl: "no you have to potty dance...it goes like this!"
I'm with ya girl. time always goes slower when you need to go to the bathroom.

since when?

since when is a small fry so small? I ordered a small fry at wendy's the other day...and it was tiny. which turned out to be a good thing anyway...because after putting a single fry into my stomach I immediately threw it back up. it couldn't have even been scripted that perfectly.

in pet news:
*so we're still not in the clear with the cat. that's not to say it's not an allergy, but that's not to say that it is. she got worse again and then better again. hopefully that's how allergies work.
*either way, it is nice that she has a personality again. she grooms the dog, and pounces on his tail (see facebook video. hilarious). she also chases the carpet fuzz...and everything is a toy. she also responds to any can opening (which made it difficult to make chicken and dumplings as I opened several cans of chicken soup.) she follows you around at your feet and cries until you feed her. I swear we are accidentally starving her. but she already eats more than her weight class should. she also finally sleeps. almost as if she needs to catch up for all the times when she couldn't sleep from itching.
*we also had a particularly scary/funny moment with roscoe. we saw crusty sticky brown stuff on his belly (similar to the consistency of cat face scabs) and freaked out. only to realize that it was peanut butter from the kong I left in his kennel that day. he also got a negative heartworm test! at least we are in the clear with one critter! I also have enjoyed getting to go to the dog park with aaryn and carol and niko and scobee. hopefully that tradition continues.

in home news:
*our christmas cards arrived! as most of you already figured out, it has the picture from my facebook. I couldn't resist the temptation. but the cards are cute too! I got them with a groupon discount $25 for $75 of credit on mixbook.com. I got our christmas cards and our wedding album!
*I also got a promotion! I am now an Educator II! as of now, the only change will be that I give VIP tours with exclusive groups through the park. it will be fun to really get to know the families!
*we are also dealing with the IRS....so pray for us there. we filed a (correct) return in february....they adjusted the "errors" on the return....then billed us and told us to amend the "errors" which they created. so I have to refile...to change it back to the original way it was...and pay them. ugh.
*also my parents got us furniture!! hooray! so we have a rug and two chairs and a sidetable in the living room..like real adults! it also doesn't sound so loud when rhett yells at football anymore. I also have a mosquito stalker. it is worse than a human stalker I promise.
*we also have punk neighbor kids...they broke some of our outside decorations! we found them broken in the street.
*our dollar store advent chocolate calendars are only soso this year.
*my latest craft projects include: beluga whale handwarmers, hemming a pair of pants without an iron or sewing machine, santa locker decorations and clothesline christmas decorations. will post pictures later.
*rhett's store buyback is going REALLY WELL. which is awesome. and kevin is here visting!
*we also officially booked our anniversary trip to tampa. 2 nights and 3 days of vacation fun. yesss. busch gardens, tampa zoo, clearwater aquarium, and probably a nice dinner thrown in there.

and work news...everyone's favorite.
*good parenting skills: 1) baby with "my mom is hot" written on shirt. 2)teaching the kids how to tap on the glass until the fish/animal comes over. 3)saying the f-word around baby. 4) taking baby's blanket to warm yourself up. because you know if you are cold, surely baby isn't.
*cute quotes: 1) kid: "how old is your oldest dolphin?" me: "33." kid "when I was 5 I was 33." 2)kid: "you know what I call it when a baby looks like its mom?" me: "what?" kid: "a midget clone."3) referring to sea lions: "look it's just like if we cut off chaos's legs!" 4) singing old mcdonald: "old mcdonald had a pig, eieio"...pause...... me: "ok what's a pig say?" ...."with a pig, pig here and a pig, pig there."
*other observations: 1) some of the sound effects that play at the slides at aquatica sound like babies crying. that's a way to get a kid on a ride. 2) I watched a baby lizard catch a cricket bigger than it was. awesome. 3)I saw what I thought might be a segway tour puttering across an overpass (maybe from universal studios?) but after doing some research, I was unable to find such a thing. segway posse?

merry christmas!!