T-minus 48 hours

Today marks 2 days until we arrive in Texas. after months of planning and plan changing, we will finally arrive and get to enjoy the fruits of our labor. we get to see our BFFs, play in college station, see my mommy!!!!! eat delicious Texas foods that we have missed out on for 7-9 months (aka Chicken express...florida how do you live without it?), meet our nephew, and celebrate thanksgiving and christmas with the grimes side of the family.

That means that today (aka my day off) is filled with vacation preparation. conjunction junction. and to make my life even more easy, I signed up to take a test to progress at work tomorrow (so I have to study for that as well). But I have found ways to break up the day (thank you new episodes of toddlers and tiaras on netflix). I will defeat you suitcases and cleaning. I also already foresee myself missing Roscoe while we are gone.

last but not least, thank you to Alex Thomas who is the new best person I know. He agreed, without hesitation, to housesit for us....cat medication/baths and all. Alex Thomas: I appreciate you more than I could ever express to you in words. You are a really great young man, and we have loved getting to be a part of your family. Thank you for showing us love!

other news in the grimes household:
-we lowered our energy bill by 50%! how awesome is that! best month ever.
-once upon a time the catroom (guest bathroom) stunk bad. of course, there is a litterbox in a tight space, but it was an unbearable stench. after scrubbing and replacing all the litter, I discovered that the box could not be the source of the stench. low and behold, the toilet of stagnant water was moldy and disgusting and had gone untouched for over a month until it became disgusting. glad I discovered it finally. now it just smells like cat in there. bearable.
-I beat rhett in fantasy football last week.
-I made a strawberry cake on sunday night...and rhett's compliment for how it smelled/looked was "oh man I am going to do nasty things to that cake." A similar comment about my taco dinner last week was "oh man Roscoe I bet you wish you were a human right now so you could eat these tacos." his compliments make me giggle.
-I love it when I catch Rhett rewatching football games online that LITERALLY just ended on real TV.
-There was a particularly gross moment where the dog yawned, then I yawned, and he licked inside my mouth (gross enough, right?). well then Rhett felt compelled to say to me: "oh that's so gross, he was licking the bottom of my feet last night!". gag me.
-We have been taking morning walks together before work. It is easily the best part of my day.
-our friends the Somers finally brought home their 2 boys from ethiopia! What a glorious and celebratory week for them! We can't wait to take them to Aquatica for their first ever waterslides when we get back from Texas!
-a normal discussion in the grimes household: how much would someone have to pay you to lick your own armpit? can you even reach your own armpit?


other news on the pet front:can you spot her?
-we went to the dermatologist. the bill was depressing and the news was less than shocking. we are continuing treating for the things we already treated for. this better work dadgommit. I am so done with treating the same things with no results. fix my dang cat already!
-Roscoe has started quickly emptying and bringing over every toy in his toy bin any time he wants any attention at all. it makes for a very uncomfortable couch.

also in the news:
-what the what? did anybody see the man in Ohio who let 56 exotic animals (grizzlies, lions, cheetahs, bengal tigers, camels) free and then killed himself? good job guy, it's all your fault that 18 out of the 2500 remaining tigers of the world are now dead.
-matt wertz and michael buble both released christmas cd's this week. what to do?

and last but not least, everyone's (I'm sure) favorite: work stories and guest quotes:
NEWS:
-I had the privilege of staffing the sea lion area minutes after a sea lion pup was born. (then of course closing the area for a quick check up.) but still, awesome. seeing a 10 minute old sea lion= check.
-the word "penguin" is not in my phone. how can you be a zoologist's phone and not know the word penguin?
-I officially gave my first dolphin tour, first penguin talk, and second penguin talk all in the same week. a week of firsts, and a week of fun! so exciting!

these are a few of my FAVORITE THINGS:
-spray sunscreen: as much as I love your convenience, I would equally love a disclaimer on your bottle stating "lack of regard for other persons downwind or within a confined space may result in injury" thereby making it acceptable for me to throw punches.
-seeing a grown woman reach her foot over a 4' wall into a dolphin pool. classic.
-when a daddy says "look at all the mantas" to a child. we have not a single manta in SW.
-clearly, squirrels are the most awesome animals on the planet. because guests will turn their back on a manatee feeding to get one step closer to a squirrel.
-earlier in the week I opened up a drawer in our riddle box to discover....a roach. which then proceeded to scamper away. SICK. hopefully the nearest child wasn't traumatized.
-trick or treating at halloween spooktacular. bookoos of free candy.
-settling bets and dividing families: "is it a dolphin or a whale?"
-talking to little kids as they lather themselves in sunscreen, with no social regard for how silly they look lotioning themselves.

QUOTES:
after seeing a woman duck under a rope barrier at an overlook across the sea lion pool, I made my up to the overlook to tell her: "ma'am, I'm really sorry this area is closed off right now." woman says: "oops." like she stumbled across a closed area. it's not like you made a concerted effort to dodge the rules.

woman: "what will I see at dolphin cove?"
me thinking: 'dolphins.'

me holding a polar bear pawprint: "can you guess what animal this is from?
little girl: "a monster."

boy: "how do dolphins sleep?"
me: "they sleep half of their brains at a time, so they are always halfway awake. can you think why that might be important?"
boy: "so they can check for monsters under their bed?"

me: "do you know what polar bears eat?"
boy: "root beer?"

and I overheard this last one from a lifeguard. it's nice to know we are not the only ones who deal with silly questions.
man asked: "why did you breed dolphins and penguins?"

Zombie Cat

like our halloween decorations? we do too. we also made our mr. and mrs. potato head costumes. psyched to trick or treat with our nephews!! also, speaking of halloween, Rhett calls Aggie zombie cat. because she looks like a zombie, obviously. we officially go see the dermatologist on Monday. hopefully they tell us it was mange afterall...because she seemed to get better after last week (when she completely destroyed her face. our closet looked like a murder scene).

more about the pets:
-we bought their christmas gifts. can't wait 2 more months!!
-Rhett says the SPCA must have shown Roscoe videos on how to be an awesome dog. because he is.
-aggie's new allergen-free food makes her dooky smell NASTY. G-ross.


more things I like about Rhett:
-sleeping in until 10am last weekend when it rained ALL DAY. literally 3am until 10:30pm.
-waking up at 5am when the smoke detector decides to get a low battery. on an 11ft ceiling. boo.
-changing our oil and washing our cars together
-when he speaks my toothbrush language
-when he lays out my clothes for me in the morning when I don't want to get up and go to work

more things about work:
-it is officially desturbing to hear the key west music on the radio (music that plays on loop in dolphin cove all day long)
-I almost punched a young man in the face after watching him feed his cell phone to a pelican. do you have a brain sir?
-when you drive to work with no AC on, your "fuel range" actually increases. coolest feeling ever.
- I am officially tour trained!!! which made for the coolest week ever. touched a shark, touched a penguin, met a puffin, walked inside penguin encounter, saw a manatee xray, saw the top of shark encounter, went inside the infamous fish house, saw the surgical suite where frogs and manatees alike are treated, saw one day's worth of fish at SW (5,000 lb.) in the freezer, saw the rescued pilot whale...and generally enjoyed myself. can't wait to give tours so the guests can have such an awesome time as well.
-I also applied to cross-train as a reservationist. hopefully I have enough confrontational ability to deal with trouble guests.
-joking with coworkers about LRS-ing trouble guests. an LRS is what we do with our dolphins when they don't listen...ignore them for 3 seconds. I hate when complainy people get exactly what they want. so can't we just ignore them for 3 seconds too?
-our tour bus drivers are bob and larry....just like veggie tales!

and last, but certainly everyone's favorite: guest quotes.
-man approaching a trick-or-treat booth during our halloween spooktacular: "trick or treat I heard you have tootsie rolls."
-woman in all seriousness (because she is a SW employee's wife) in penguin encounter: "when the penguins get older and sick, do you ever give them to shamu?"
-mother to daughter: "look honey, it's a shark stingray thingy." real informative mom. good thing I was standing there.

Thank Shamu It's Friday

and what a nice weekend it has the potential to be!

all updates, big and small:

there was a mosquito inside our house that was literally the biggest mosquito I have seen in my life. like Godzilla mosquito. it was at least 1 cm long.

I hit a bucket in the road on my way to work one day. ugh.

we finally went swing dancing here in town! Our friends eric and shaina went with us...and man did I miss dancing! I had so much fun! I can't wait to go back again sometime.

I met a really nice couple at SW who I might have a future babysitting relationship with. crazy? maybe. but they were so cute!

I have applied to be a full time educator....and on another note, I begin tour training next week!! pictures to come! also, it is slightly disillusioning to see pictures of trainers partying. role models. disappointment.

orlando made it on the top 20 list of "sleepless US cities". I believe it. 3 out of the last 4 weeks I had a lot of trouble sleeping. I am finally just this week making up for all that lost sleep, and sleeping through the night. oh, and, not a single TX city made the list.

our laptop crashed, and our awesome computer friends in our small group fixed it. they are so awesomer than best buy.

Daddy came to visit!!! we went to downtown disney, and he came to have dinner at our house, and we went to seaworld. and we did everything in 5 hours. who knew that was even possible.

tired rhett strikes again...we got on the topic of ordering our food "a la carte" while we were at seaworld...and he said "I don't want it over ice cream." oh honey. that's a la mode.

so I'm not super great at fantasy football. but I'm learning, and trying. I finally won my first game this week!

and of course, the cat. it is very difficult and embarrassing to look at her, and see that she is worse. she looks horrible. and we still don't have a diagnosis. we are 2 weeks away from visiting the dermatologist 45 minutes and $400 away. the poor thing. she likes to sleep in roscoe's kennel, and he gets confused. especially when I ask him to go in there. he kind of lays down on top of her. we tried to treat her for food allergies, so far with no success. we are currently treating for scabies. next treatment is for pemphigus, which is autoimmune and basically her own body is telling her skin not to hold on to itself. bless her heart.

and on a lighter note...some guest quotes.

belugas: *vocalizing*
guest near walruses: "is that a child? that must be one sick child."

guest: "isn't the polar bear lonely?"
me: "actually polar bears are solitary animals."
guest: "you couldn't even give it a penguin buddy?"

guest: "who's skull is this?"
me: "well why don't you try and tell me what it looks like?"
guest: "i don't know:
me: "it's a bottlenose dolphin."
guest: "ohhh I was thinking tarantula."
what??

also, I saw a barracuda fart. awesome.

a big sigh of....

touching a penguin. no big deal.

the parents came to visit! daddy comes on sunday!!!!

my home away from home.

brittany + great white shark

aww tilly! what a big boy!

a sigh of relief? contentment? exhaustion? all of the above. life has certainly kept us busy over the last 10 days.

firstly, because it is most recently, we returned to the vet. I decided last night that the cat was not, in fact, getting better. so the vet trip was inevitable. and today I had a day off. so bright and early we arrived to the loving staff who agreed, she is not better. they re-tested for mange (because I was so CERTAIN that's what it was. thank you cat webmd). negative. the new diagnosis: autoimmune. drop everything. what? skin cancer? hyper-allergies? hyper-sensitivity? all of these things sound like things a cat shouldn't get. I was JUST reading about how cats are still not very domesticated. still WILD. how can they get such a complicated and domestic sickness? and what kind of CAT needs a DERMATOLOGIST? I, as a human, have never visited a dermatologist. so that's where we are. our cat is on Roids, and hopefully we can juice up her immune system so she quits destroying her own body. her poor bloody face just makes me so sad. especially because she so desperately wants love, and I am so willing to just let her wipe her mangled disgusting face all over me. in brighter news...the cat loves to play with the dog's tail. which is hilarious. she also gives him the "you're nuts" look when he chases his ball around. like, "how could that be entertaining you. simple pleasures for simple minds." anyone out there who likes animals...read "animals make us human." (thank you mom). GREAT book. it is also funny to watch the cat realize she has to go to the bathroom and dash off to the litter box mid-stride. and when she falls off of things because she stretches too far. we also have video of her attacking a string cheese wrapper. good thing we bought her toys. I also had a pet dream....about a dog eating a fruit by the foot and then pooping out poop on the 3' fruit by the foot paper.

oh suburban life. we just got a new sign in our subdivision...so we no longer live in "COLON WODS" we now live in "COLONIAL WOODS". awesome. also, you know you have a long commute when you have to switch radio stations halfway to work because it goes out. also, I have put in an application for an animal care job with the education department at a local zoo. it would be 2-3 days a week so I could balance SW at the same time! hopefully I hear from them soon. also, rhett and I celebrated our 4 year dating anniversary. which also means we are 100 days away from our wedding anniversary. it's cool how that worked out. they will always be 100 days apart! we will have to do some creative counting down. last year we did pennies. speaking of countdowns...who's excited about chocolate advent calendars? I AM!

daytime television. watching jeopardy with humans versus a computer. how does that work? watson mysteries. also: an episode of cheaters in which the wife's nurse fell in love with the husband. she quotes "we thought you were going to die." well you were here nurse, moron. lose-lose situation. on a higher note, nighttime television has returned! parenthood and how I met your mother down; big bang theory, the office, parks and rec and House to go! it will be a busy fall.

be sure and visit facebook for a new photo album of delightful goodness!


last but not least: guest quotes.

"what kind of skull is that?"
me: "it's a bottlenose dolphin."
"oh I thought it was a bird."
"a bird?"
"you know, like kevin from Up!"

son: "how do they sleep?"
me: "well dolphins actually sleep one half of their brain at a time, so they can always be a little bit awake."
dad: "like you (son) in school."
son: "no I don't use any of my brain in school. except on spelling tests."

mother: "we did a school project on sea turtles. and I know it was good because I did it. I should save it so my younger son can use it next year. there are just too many projects, they can't expect us to get them all done."
me (thinking): way to go mom. so your children don't do any of their own school work?

also I might have had a minor panic attack when I saw creepy fingers clinging to a little girl, only to realize she had an ET doll holding on around her neck. you know she didn't get that at seaworld either.

ketchup.

or catch up. whichever you prefer. if you prefer ketchup, try your fridge. if you prefer catching up, stay right here.

a lot of these will be pet things. let's start with that...because now we are basically a zoo. more animals live in our house than humans. so the cat uses my hand to groom itself. because she is coned and can't use her own paws. so she licks my hand and then wipes her face on it. sick. but cute. it is also funny to watch her because she can only reach the tips of her toes and the tip of her tail to groom herself. those parts of her body are clean. the cat sleeps on the dog bed and the dog likes the cat bed...and they get along great. they also play together. she swats at his tail and he gives me the 'mom aren't you going to stop her' look. and she has found a place where she can wait and pounce on him when he tears down the hallway. too funny. and a funny rhett quote: "CAT! rule one of begging! don't claw the person that you want something from!" also...I took the dog out last night, and he started to pee, then saw a lizard that he wanted to chase. he continued peeing while chasing the lizard, so proceeding to continue to pee all over himself. moron.

and what have we been up to lately?

well the grimes came to visit! so a lot, actually! we went to seaworld on saturday, and did EVERYTHING. ladies and gentlemen, it is physically possible to see everything at seaworld in one day. (not suggested without a tour guide, of course :) ) then sunday we went to play washers at the doggy park and went to watch the A&M/SMU game with the local A&M club and met some local aggies! btho. then monday we went to downtown disney. and let me tell you, I love downtown disney. it is such a fun date! we visited all the shops, and ate at rainforest cafe, had ghiradelli (MOM YOU HAVE TO TRY THEIR PUMPKIN SPICE CARAMEL FILLED SQUARES OH MY GOSH I HAD 3). we rode the boats to the resort that we stayed on our honeymoon. and then...there was a "dance party" going on. I made rhett promise to dance with me. I had him convinced. LITERALLY, right as we approached the dance party (we said, let's see how good the next song is) the dj came over the mic and said "and now we are going to do some swing dancing!" is that fate or what? so we went down and lindied. lindyed? lindy-ed? lindy hopped. awesome. and tuesday was discovery cove day. we snorkeled with the reef fishes and the southern, spotted eagle and cownose rays (HUGE) and *hopefully* got some good pictures (soon to come). what a great week.

hours are starting to pick back up again (already) with work. which is nice. and it was nice to have a little break after 40 hr. wks most of the summer. hopefully I can start volunteering soon. be praying for possible career moves? my brain is all over the place.

also, kids jeopardy is awesome. because I actually know the answers.

guest quotes:
woman entering arctic: "man it got dark really quickly!"
me: "umm it's a fake sky. you're really inside."

little boy:"do you think I could beat a polar bear?"
me: "probably not, polar bears are twice as big as me, and weigh 5 times as much."
little boy: "what if I had a sword?"
me: "maybe if you had a sword."
boy's dad: "I love it when he talks about killing things to the conservation people."

joke. "what is a killer whale's favorite type of pudding?"
answer: "tapiORCA pudding!"

bleeding hearts. it's a long one!

our cat: as you most likely saw on facebook, rhett and I have taken in a very sick kitty. she followed us home from our dog walk, stayed on the porch all night long, and we declared her ours (and named her Aggie). we took her to the (Awesome) vet...who poured out their love and some free help on us. I will put up before and after pictures once she is all better. she is doing well, and roscoe seems to be acclimating (slowly) to her presence. he just wants to sniff her until his nose explodes. and she has a tolerance of about 45 seconds before she is tired of being sniffed. they will soon be cuddling! speaking of kitties...the cat aisle at petsmart is ridiculous. everything is pink, purple, matching decals, and believe it or not....multicolored cat nail covers (plastic nail polish). word.

central florida life: I fully appreciate when our neighbors do laundry. it makes the whole neighborhood smell delicious. and since I haven't been able to use scented laundry detergent since middle school...I just want to curl up in their garage and go to sleep. ahhh tide. you smell like heaven.

I saw someone rear end someone else on the way to small group. even though the offended had his windows down, and I was able to hear it going the other direction, he didn't seem to notice. lucky for the offender.

we met a black lab puppy named abby. she was pulling her owner along on a skateboard, and we met her at the corner. which was unlucky for said skateboarder, because she totally detoured towards us causing him to fly off the skateboard. epic.

our local walgreens had everything on my list buy one get one free. best day ever.

the orlando sentinel (local paper, pretty good) gave out free copies in our neighborhood! awesome! they are all in spanish.

apparently chili's is the new classy place to get trashed and talk about your abusive boyfriends and latest sexual encounters. oh central florida.

we saw a vulture scavenging in one of our neighbors trash cans. it was awesome. and huge. we also have a gorgeous hawk and a few curious turtles in the woods near the house. awesome to watch slash restrain roscoe from pouncing on.

the local news said: "Irene is ready to give the coast a whoopin'". best newscast ever.

alafaya discount tire=awesome. flat tire fixed, tires rotated for free in 30 minutes. you can't beat service like that. also while I sat there, I was able to read this slightly offensive article. enjoy. didn't realize florida hated texas so much.

husband things: tired rhett is my favorite rhett. except for roscoe-dog-voice rhett. tired rhett turns any wrinkle/skin fold on my knees/tummy/forehead into the harry potter sorting hat.

it is already christmastime in the grimes household. be jealous. christmas music has commenced.

a few days ago, I turned the water cold while rhett was in the shower. he didn't realize what I did. he thought the valve was loose. I did it 3 or 4 times. I tried again yesterday. he noticed. then poured our brita pitcher on me while I was in the shower.

work things: there aren't very many this week. I didn't work much. I did discover that swiping into a certain building (where we put away our microphone) brings up our picture at the security gate. so if you walk straight to the gate, you see yourself on the guard's computer screen. weird.

"is the water sweet or salty?"

guest: "where do the animals sleep?"
me: "right here, this is their home all the time."
guest: "they don't go inside at night?"
my thoughts: 'there isn't an "inside" in the ocean is there?'
my words: "no ma'am."

saturday morning

a day off? that actually happens? I can't remember my last official day of nothing-critical-to-do-today. it is wonderful. I watched the magic school bus. and might go use a coupon to get new white shoes (it was dubbed my present to myself for getting the part-time job).

so...updates. Rhett is at work today....it is officially the rush. keep your fingers crossed for a promising sell period!

the grimes come to visit in only 2 weeks! we can't wait! we got our tickets booked for discovery cove, and seaworld on saturday! and the last weekend of summer shows! whoop whoop! and watching the aggies BTHO SMU in the season opener with the central florida texas a&m club! we can't wait. and my daddy is coming to visit the last week of september for a work meeting! and then we go to texas at the end of october, and then my parents for thanksgiving, and then rhett's family for christmas! I can't believe that we are close enough to christmas and keeping busy enough that we will get to see someone every 3 weeks for the rest of the year! eeeek!!! how great did that work out?

last year, the wedding forced me to be productive. I brought up taking christmas card pictures soon, and rhett scoffed. then I mentioned by this time last year I had the cards finished and addressed, and all christmas presents purchased and wrapped. I've got to get a move on! speaking of wedding, our video came in the mail this week! we thought we would wait to watch it, but we gave in. pretty weird to watch ourselves. and funny to see everything we missed!

also, I am teaching myself sign language. as mentioned in a previous post, I think it is awesome. I started with a website that teaches you your first 100 words. who knows what I will do next? probably join the library and get a video.

also, I didn't get the animal care job. which is ok, I didn't expect it. I just loved the swim test! I also got a callback for an educator job at the museum, which didn't sound like something I would want to do, or something that I could do at the same time as SW. so I didn't get that one either.

last night rhett and I played mario, and our discussion to describe world 8 turned into something like this.
"oh my goodness just run as fast as you can!" "world 8 is like satan's butthole." "watch out for that hedgehog!" "that's not a hedgehog that's a football helmet with legs!" "no way it's a hedgehog, I wouldn't want a hedgehog in my butthole." "well would you want a football helmet with legs in your butthole?"
I love my husband.

doggy things: when he gets the hiccups, it's adorable. I hate the hiccups, so I feel sorry for him, but it is so cute. also on days like today, we have been playing agility in the living room. I set up an obstacle course- which he is pretty good at. he is so smart! then he goes and lays down to take a nap, and sticks his head under the couch. so when I look down at my feet I see the headless dog. too funny.

speaking of doggies, when we went to the Texas A&M vs. UCF soccer game (btho!) we met the soccer collies! coolest dogs ever. you can even see me in one of their pictures!

and of course, work things.

whoa! check out that pokey-ball!

julie scardina is my new career idol. sw/bg animal ambassador. I want to be her when I grow up. see her segments on the today show!

-dad talking to son: points to batswana on map "this is where your sister was named after. ranaka! and....." points to california "this is where you are named after! logan!"
-dad turns to me: "it's pretty sad when one of your children is named after a city in botswana, and the other is named after a character from gilmore girls."

brother and sister pair approach the chameleon enclosure. sister has seen chameleon earlier in the day and told her brother it was "this big" with fingers about 2 inches apart. brother approaches enclosure and nearly poops himself because chameleon is actually about 18" long.
"that chameleon is not 'this big'!" brother says. sister says: "yes he is!" (as she stands 2-3 feet away from enclosure and holds up her fingers to measure).

that awkward moment when you realize you have been telling guests it is a "swimming anenome" about 50% of the time and a "swimming anemone" about 50% of the time. how cliche.

that awkward moment when you are capable of listening and talking at the same time, and you hear a guest behind you say "just like me at home, talking to myself" as you narrate over the microphone.

that awkward moment when you want to kick a child after he kicks the chameleon enclosure. what the what?

that awkward moment when you want to kick another child who is spinning her krinkle straw so it whistles incessantly and you can't escape.

that awkward moment when a weird dude licks all his raspberry pastry off his plate and tells you not to order a mango cream drink from starbucks. then chugs it.

that awkward moment when you congratulate a little girl for getting all the answers right on a matching game, who then tells you she just looked at the tag.